A financial expert and psychologist explain why big money sometimes seems more dangerous than poverty.
It sounds paradoxical that someone fears getting rich, but for some, the prospect of success and profit actually causes more anxiety than the thought of financial hardship. People unconsciously create obstacles to their own financial growth, procrastinate on important actions, turn down opportunities, and self-sabotage without even realizing it.
From this article you will learn:
- Why does the fear of getting rich arise ?
- how the fear of success and sudden wealth manifests itself ;
- How can this problem be worked out ?
Why does the fear of getting rich arise?
The fear of becoming rich is a deep, internalized experience that most often arises because people are intimidated by the prospect of growth, success, new opportunities, and responsibility. The roots of this fear almost always lie in unconscious beliefs about money that arose in childhood.
The development of financial attitudes is primarily influenced by :
- the family’s financial situation and its beliefs about money;
- personal experience – how a child absorbs financial “rules of the game” through communication with parents, friends, the educational environment and the media;
- individual character traits that help or, on the contrary, hinder the proper management of the budget.
Childhood beliefs
A person’s perception of money and financial habits are indeed formed in childhood. Those who grew up in poverty often perceive success as a violation of the natural order, as something “foreign.”
Michael Easter, author of ” The Scarcity Brain ,” notes that such people develop a unique self-concept : they feel like they’re not entitled to more. Therefore, they may perceive any achievements and financial growth not as a blessing, but as a source of anxiety and insecurity.
“There’s a study that showed that fear of success is often formed as a result of parental ‘programming,’ where achievement was associated with conflict, punishment, or loss of love. Participants who experienced wealth anxiety demonstrated pronounced internal inhibitions and an unconscious mindset of ‘The higher I climb, the harder the fall.'”
Even if, as a child, a person received parental attention only for results, this directly impacted their self-esteem and created blocking scenarios that prevented them from achieving a high level of psychological well-being.”
The influence of society and culture
Social environment also plays a significant role. In societies where wealth is equated with greed and poverty with honesty, fear of money is often linked to the fear of judgment. One might recall folk tales where the good and honest hero is always poor, and wealth is associated with cunning, theft, and deception. This creates a deep internal conflict: on the one hand, a desire to improve one’s standard of living, while on the other, a desire to fit in, not stand out, and avoid being envied or judged.
People who lived in the USSR grew up with the idea of condemning those who wanted to earn more than others, so their feelings of guilt for striving for success may still linger. As a result, they often deliberately keep a low profile to avoid criticism and envy from their neighbors.
“Fear of money is based on deep-seated beliefs: ‘Money isn’t important,’ ‘Big money comes dishonestly,’ ‘Money corrupts people,’ ‘Wealth leads to loneliness,’ ‘Success comes at a price,’ and so on. A person may not even realize they’re living with such beliefs, but they still feel discomfort and anxiety when approaching financial success.”
The Impact of Low Financial Literacy
When a person has the attitude that “money is not for me,” material issues take on a shade of mythical and inaccessible.
Research by Jamin Lee of Minnesota State University (USA) and his colleagues shows that a lack of financial knowledge only increases anxiety, complicates one’s relationship with money, and encourages avoidance of responsibility. People with such beliefs are more likely to become confused in complex situations, get confused with numbers, are prone to drama, and are unable to plan their spending calmly and consistently.
How does the fear of success and sudden wealth manifest itself?
Initially, people experience a “honeymoon”—a feeling of euphoria and freedom. This is often followed by an emotional decline, which is especially pronounced in people with mental health issues, such as bipolar disorder.
Over time, joy is replaced by guilt, anxiety, and fear of the unknown future. People often feel shame for “undeserved” success, especially if the money is tied to the loss of loved ones (such as an inheritance).
Internal contradictions
Psychologist Stephen Goldbart coined the term “sudden wealth syndrome” after studying the adjustment difficulties of people who unexpectedly acquired large fortunes. Goldbart noted that sudden wealth often triggers psychological and emotional problems:
- identity crisis ;
- depression;
- insomnia;
- anxiety.
The inner conflicts of those who fear success and wealth often boil down to the fear of losing their own identity, being rejected by loved ones, or being unable to cope with new challenges. This leads to a struggle between the desire for the best and the fear of losing the love of others or a sense of inner stability: “If I get rich, I’ll become a stranger to myself,” “They’ll stop loving me,” “I’m not worthy of these changes.”
Financial impostor syndrome
It’s the feeling of being unworthy of your own accomplishments. In her book, “Escape from Imposter Syndrome,” author Claire Hosa identifies four components of imposter syndrome:
- perfectionism;
- stupor;
- desire to please everyone;
- procrastination.
A financial impostor doesn’t accept that new opportunities are deserved—for example, they continue to wear old shoes or don’t allow themselves to spend on health.
“For many people, wealth doesn’t align with their self-image. If a person perceives themselves as ‘simple,’ ‘ordinary,’ ‘modest,’ then a sudden increase in wealth causes internal conflict.
Imposter syndrome sets in: “I don’t deserve this money,” “It’s not for me,” “I’ll be judged.” This inner disconnect breeds anxiety and sabotage of success. Ultimately, this manifests as constant doubt, postponing action and important financial decisions, turning down lucrative offers and promotions, anxiety when talking about money, and criticism of the rich as a form of self-defense. Procrastination and self-sabotage manifest themselves at moments when real chances for success appear.
Fear, paranoia, secrecy
Suspicion of family, friends, and advisors develops. Stress can lead to paranoia, and the fear of losing money makes a person secretive.
Loneliness and isolation
A person who suddenly becomes wealthy feels alienated. Friends and family sometimes distance themselves, changing their attitudes, which further increases the isolation. The usual daily routine is disrupted, leading to uncertainty and a loss of purpose in life.
Research shows that loneliness can lead to depression, alcohol abuse, sleep disorders, and personality disorders.
Frivolity and destructive behavior
Some people start spending money mindlessly, trying to experience euphoria through shopping, gambling, spontaneous and expensive trips, alcohol, drugs, and risky investments.
Ultimately, this leads to burnout, wasted wealth and the risk of addiction.
The Impact of Sudden Wealth on Relationships
Money changes relationships with loved ones, can ruin friendships, or provoke envy. Some friends become distant, while others become more active in their attempts to gain advantage.
For a person who has become rich, it becomes difficult to distinguish sincerity from self-interest; suspicions and distrust increase.
How to overcome the fear of wealth
Healthy financial behavior is built on a balance between wise spending and the ability to save, a sober assessment of one’s capabilities, and a desire to plan for tomorrow. But it’s also important to remember: money is not the goal of life, but a tool for shaping it, a means of realizing plans, and not a measure of one’s self-worth.
If we break down the formula for financial well-being, it will consist of the following:
- responsibility – the ability to plan and control your expenses;
- conscious consumption – understanding the difference between “want” and “need”;
- creation of a financial cushion ;
- willingness to invest in yourself – education, professional growth, development of personal qualities.
Camilla Strömbekk, Associate Professor in the Department of Management and Engineering at Linköping University, emphasizes that people with developed self-control tend to be more successful at saving, have a more relaxed attitude toward money, and are more confident about the future—that is, they know how to budget and set long-term goals. Therefore, it is essential to develop mindfulness.
To reduce anxiety in the moment, use these techniques.
Reframe your internal dialogue
Identify limiting beliefs and transform them into positive, empowering ones: “I can’t manage this right now, but I can learn,” “This is difficult for me, so I’m growing.” This conscious shift in internal dialogue changes your thinking, and then your actions.
Positive financial beliefs look something like this: “Money is a resource and an opportunity,” “I am capable of creating financial stability with my own hands,” “Skills and knowledge belong to me, regardless of the amount of money I have at the moment,” “I accept responsibility for the abundance in my life.”
Work with your body
When fear of money or success takes hold, the body reacts: it freezes, tenses, and becomes confused. Sit comfortably, place your feet on the floor for stability, and focus on your breathing—take four deep breaths and six smooth exhalations. Notice where the tension is in your body—simply pay attention to it. Acknowledge the fear without judgment: “Yes, I’m anxious, and I’m aware of it.” Then consciously distribute your attention throughout your body to feel a sense of stability. This approach helps you regain balance and reduce the severity of your fear response.
Rewrite your “money story”
Write down the story you tell yourself about money: “Money is…,” “Wealthy people are…,” “If I have a lot of money, then….” Consider the emotions these statements evoke. Then rewrite your money story, choosing more sensible and supportive ideas: “Money is a resource, I can learn to manage it,” “Rich people come in all shapes and sizes, I choose to be ethical and prosperous.” This re-examination of your story helps you change your life scenario.
Honesty is especially important—with yourself and others. Self-deception like “I’m fine” prevents you from facing your real fear and working through it. Being honest with yourself becomes the foundation for a new relationship with your finances.
“Visualization techniques for a new self-image, one capable of success without guilt and fear, are helpful. This identity can be reinforced by strengthening your self-esteem and surrounding yourself with similarly confident and successful people. It’s also important to develop your financial literacy: learn financial tools and gradually expand your skills in using them for your own purposes. The greater your confidence in handling money, the lower your fear level.”
This is how you gradually get used to greater financial freedom. It’s important to take small steps: if you’re used to living on a certain amount, try increasing your spending by 10% for a month, focusing on things that will truly improve your quality of life (food, leisure, education). The goal is to allow your brain to get used to the idea that money brings joy, not just stress.
It’s important to understand that fear of success and wealth hinders your development. If you feel stuck in your role, take the following steps:
- ask for a raise, even if you don’t think you deserve it;
- try to sell your services or products at a higher price;
- don’t skimp on what’s really important to you;
- Connect with those whose personal experience confirms that well-being is real and accessible.
“Develop the skill of self-compassion, that is, the ability to be kind to yourself in moments of vulnerability, and reduce the pressure from the inner critic.
If the situation gets out of control, it’s important not to delay and seek professional support. During therapy with clients, I sometimes use a cognitive-behavioral approach to reduce anxiety and restructure destructive beliefs such as, “I’m only worthy of something if the outcome is perfect.” In some cases, methods that focus on emotional memory, such as EMDR therapy, are effective, as is Ericksonian self -hypnosis for deeply working through blocks and internal inhibitions.
The path to financial success begins not only with budgeting but also with the inner conviction: “I can, I am worthy, I am safe to have more.” Our psychological well-being is closely linked to how we view our own desires—whether we view them as a source of guilt or a direction for growth. After all, wealth is not a danger, but an opportunity for choice.